Tea break.

November 14, 2008

We are off to Malaysia for a couple of weeks, help yourselves to tea whilst we’re gone 🙂

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PS. Sorry there are no biscuits!


November 9, 2008

….. Use chopsticks*

1. First chopstick: hold so that the thickest part is at the base of your thumb and the thinner part is on the lower side of your middle fingertip.

2. Trap the stick in place with your thumb, leaving about 3 inches to extend beyond your fingertip.

3. Hold second chopstick just like a pencil.

4. Keep the bottom chopstick stationary and use your index finger and middle fingers to open and close the top chopstick.

5. Chase food around plate for a bit.

6. Get food nearly in mouth two or three times.

7. Get a lot of food on lap.

8. Swear loudly and dash infernal contraption to floor.

9. Demand fork.

*Shamelessly ripped off from elsewhere on the ‘net, but hey, its how I feel about the chopsticks 🙂

Saturday bloody Saturday

November 8, 2008

We had a heavy night last night and after dragging ourselves out shopping today, we decided to treat ourselves to lunch out.

I ordered the 21 day matured, 8oz rump steak, as you can see, it was a bargain at a fiver 🙂


I ordered my steak rare, which can be a problem when it arrives on one of these cast-iron sizzling skillet things. Luckily, it was sitting on a bed of sliced onion that kept it from cooking further.

WARNING : Look away now if you dont want to see its beautiful rareness as testified by the blood seeping out 🙂 mmmmm, great for dipping your chips in!


That is all.

Phishing around

November 4, 2008

Quite possibly the worst phishing email I’ve ever seen. How can they expect anyone to fall for this load of shit?

We recently determined that various computers connect on your account Abbey, Password and of multiples checs taient present before connection. We now need assure you again information of your Abbey account.

If this n’ d’ is not completed; here on November 6, 2008, we will be constrained to suspend your account indefinitely, Because it can have uses d’ fraudulent ends.

We thank you for your comprehention in this manner. To confirm your online banking of the files, click on the following bond:

>>> Click Here < <<

Thank you for your patience. Abbey service customers.

S' you like it do not answer has this e-mail because c' is only one notification.
Email to send has this address cannot be answered.

1999-2008 Abbey. All rights reserved

I’m guessing that all the D’ and S’ things and the general lack of syntax is a result of translating from some French language based African country?

Oh, hang on, I’ve checked some of the emails and letters leaving our office……. uh, forget I said anything 🙂

Lobster dinner

November 2, 2008

I know! Get us!

Lobster for dinner, it’s not even any particularly special occasion. Unless you count the fact that I celebrate my love for Paul EVERY day. Sorry, that was sickly wasn’t it?

Any ways, here it is…..

Lobster dinner

It wasn’t as extravagant as you might imagine. These cooked lobsters are currently available in Lidl for the amazing price of £4.99.

I can confirm that served up, very simply, with buttered wholemeal Hovis and eaten with a little marie rose sauce, it was delicious 🙂

So go on, treat yourself 🙂

Crappy Christmas Gifts #001

November 2, 2008

Grandad, ” Oh, look Mummy, one of those wee-wee things!”

Grandma, “It is, isn’t it? Oh, yes the wireless controllers, I remember something about that.”

Grandad, “…and it’s only £29.99 reduced from £49.99, I thought they were much more expensive than that last Christmas.”

Grandma, “Lets get 2, we can keep one at our house for when ‘lil Jonny comes to visit and one for his Christmas present.”


There’s gonna be tears all over this Christmas. I can’t believe they get away with selling this crap!

Holiday Randoms…..

November 1, 2008

OMG I thought tetra packs of Don Simon for €1 were the bottom of the barrel, in fact this supermarket own brand has it beat by a third. €0.60 for a litre of rose wine. I didnt taste it but I’m sure its more than fit for tramps. It will probably make them sleep too 🙂


Do you think Anthony Worrall Thompson has any idea that he is endorsing this range of kitchenware?

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Another OMG, can you imagine? Lewis Hamilton staying in our hotel???

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Ok, whatever you say, I’m sticking to my story!

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Oh yeah, and him above, taking time off from his internet life as cheezus69 to appear in person as Martin.

Ok, several of these are not quite strictly true, but I thought ’em funny. So there!